🏁 Aaaaaand we’re off!
I have officially started writing the first draft for the new book in the Seen in Silverbridge series!
Current Word Count: 25,755
Progress: 13/49 chapters written
You’ll remember in my previous newsletter, I was writing abroad from Málaga in Spain. I had printed out the entire 51 page outline of the book and used a red biro to mark up the final changes before I embarked on the drafting stage.
Reading and making edit changes on an outline is comparatively low effort to drafting. During that trip, I would sit by the pool with a red wine mixed with Coke Zero (it’s a real thing, I promise. It’s called a Calimocho and it’s a Spanish thing, so by drinking this ungodly but delicious mix, I’m showing that I’m cultured, okay?) and flick through the tangible pages of my genius, reading a paragraph here and there, taking regular breaks to swim in the pool.
It was pretty awesome.
But drafting is a different beast. When I’m drafting, I need a quiet space for extended periods of time. For me personally, I write better earlier in the morning — the earlier the better. I also need coffee.
My winning equation is:
Early morning + solitude + coffee = a successful drafting session.
📉 The Eight Stages of Drafting Emotions
At the mature age of 36, I’m proud to say I’ve written quite a few projects that have gone on to become completed pieces of work. In the last ten years, I’ve become familiar with my emotional trajectory during the first draft stage of a project, and it’s quite an adventure.
- I’m going to smash this out of the park! Look at me go, I’m writing 2000 words a day! If I keep this up, I’ll be finished the whole book in only forty days!
- Didn’t make my word count because I got up late and am tired today, but that’s okay, I’ll make up for it tomorrow.
- Okay, I didn’t make up for it. That’s okay! Stay positive!
- I didn’t make my word count again because a friend’s in town / I have an important meeting / an unavoidable appointment / stayed up too late last night due to an event. That’s okay! Stay positive!
- This writing is pretty bad, but that’s okay. Done is better than perfect. Stay positive!
- I’m meant to have finished Part I of V by now but I’m still least a week away, maybe even a fortnight, and if I take any longer than that, I’ll risk—don’t think about that! Stay … positive …
- Don’t think about how bad the writing is. Don’t think about how long this chapter is. Don’t think about the fact that what you just wrote doesn’t make sense, you can fix that on the next pass. Damnit, you’re thinking about how bad the writing is, aren’t you? You’re a terrible writer, how did you think you could do this? No wait, you’re a good writer. You’re a good person. You deserve to be loved!
- Wow, I finished the first draft. It’s terrible, but who cares? It’s done! 🥳
Right now, I’m at number 4, and I’ve been at 4 for the last week or so.
- I didn’t make my word count again because [insert reason here].
✨ Life is Happening
In the last two weeks, I’ve had a few things happening in tandem with my drafting process.
- We had four separate great friends here from New Zealand staying for a few nights each, meaning my normal routine is significantly harder to maintain. Brunches, dinners, a drink of alcohol, general socialising.
- I got a weird flu that affected my digestion. Any kind of food or drink (including water) gave me the appearance of being in my third trimester of pregnancy and gave me gnarly acid reflux. This meant coffee was out of the question for three weeks. Let me repeat that: No coffee at all for three weeks.
- We’ve been trying to get the offline edits for our TV show locked by the network and we’re three weeks overdue. This means long meetings between time zones of London and Auckland. Receiving feedback from multiple sources has affected my creative confidence, too.
🤷 What Do I Do?
I gotta be careful not to dodge my guilt with reassurances like, “When things settle, I’ll get back to it.” Because things don’t settle.
So, what actions do I take to ensure I’m making progress, however small? Do I beat myself up and shame myself into getting words on the page?
Noooooooo.
The trap I’ve seen a lot of my peers fall into is a feeling of apathy borne from self doubt. They start a project with a bang (as we always do), then life gets in the way, and they beat themselves up. They question whether or not they should keep going if they can’t give their project 100% of the attention it deserves.
But the seed of self doubt can grow fast if you water it. And it doesn’t grow into a cute tree. It grows into a tangle of noxious, suffocating weeds that crowd your mind-jungle and stop your good, creative trees from getting enough water.
In short, when we beat ourselves up for not achieving goals at a set time, or not keeping to a habit we’ve sworn to, we become apathetic.
I blame the adage, “If you’re not going to do it properly, don’t do it at all.”
What a bunch of bullshit.
Even if I write a grand total of ten bad words today, that’s ten more than most people write. And after a year, that’s 3,650 words, a short story! (A very short story, but that’s the not point).
There is a deceptively simple way that I get through this stage.
🧑✈️ Soldier On
Otherwise known as Just Keep Swimming. Or, Don’t Think; Do.
Turn your inner monologue off and just do the thing.
When my alarm goes off, I get up without thinking about it, make coffee (I’m allowed coffee again!), and sit in my cosy corner of the couch with laptop on my lap. Sometimes I’m so tired my eyes feel like they’re filled with grit, but after five minutes, the writing usually takes hold and I wake up.
Sometimes I write 2000 words. Sometimes I write 400. Whatever I do, I consider it a success, because writing badly is better than not writing at all.
If I can continue like this for two-to-three more months, I’ll finish the first draft.
It will be bad, but it will exist. Which is all I need.
Wish me luck!